I was recently on a walk home from the local grocery. Coming at me from a distance down the sidewalk by 2nd and Ormsby near where I live were three people...two men and a woman, walking in single file, male, female, male. As I passed them, as is my habit, I looked at them to offer a visual greeting, smile, just noticing. Oddly, the men did not even look up. Wow, I thought, they can't even look me in the eyes. The woman, mind you, was smiling, looked me square in the eyes, acknowledged being seen and seeing me. As I passed them by, I realized that the men were just reminding me about that part of me - the hiding man.
In my life, I've known him well. I know him less now more than ever, but he still can make an unannounced visit in the most interesting of places, times, situations. Yes, not only The Situation can have situations. The masculine journey, for me, has been an incredible journey of such moments. And it made me ask some questions:
"Why do I hide? Why can't I, won't I, look another man in the eyes?" For me, could be guilt, shame, fear. The first story I made up about those two men as they passed me by was that they weren't happy with where they were at or what they were doing. That wouldn't remotely be on my radar of emotional thoughts anytime recently, would it? Again, looking into the mirror on the masculine journey is a fascinating risk that is worth the reward waiting.
At Maximus Heart, we connect, inspire, and battle for deep healing and true freedom within the hearts of men on their spiritual and masculine journey. The Hiding Man, in me, wants to hide because I haven't healed in a certain part of my heart that gives me safety, trust, and courage to be me in front of others. I recognize the hiding man in other men because I've seen him in me.
My encouragement to men is: LOOK UP! See the world as you walk through it. Recognize the other men in your life - where you walk - and know they have their own journey to travel but it is very much like yours in many ways. BE SEEN! As a man, you were designed to magnify and manifest the glory of the Creator - and that is powerful, and much needed in our communities and world!
In my sojourn to and from the grocery, who knows...I might be looking to see if you see me seeing you seeing me!!
If you would like more information on MAXIMUS HEART, please click here.
Over the years I've enjoyed sharing where I've been on the spiritual and masculine journey. At this point in the Larger Story I am living inside of, it's time for me to share this exciting path with others...hence, the beginning of Maximus Heart.
You can find out more by clicking here - this online outpost is designed to assist men who are walking through their journey. Our mission is to connect, inspire, and battle for deep healing & true freedom within the hearts of men on their spiritual & masculine journey. Using many of the resources from Ransomed Heart that have helped change my life and the lives of so many others across the globe, we are offering to help facilitate, lead, and structure curriculum for other small groups interested in walking and living deep in this message.
We also help connect men to weekend adventures and boot camps - both associated with Ransomed Heart as well as The ManKind Project. More information is also coming soon for the Maximus Heart boot camp event for men, A Journey of Strength & Honor (slated for late 2015).
Please take some time to visit the site, let us know what you think, and register for one of the four featured small group study platforms scheduled for 2015. Space is limited - so act accordingly!!
Look forward to sharing more on the pages here at His Grace Amazing in the future about how this exciting path of mission and calling is helping make impact in the lives of men seeking a deeper walk on their journey and their lives with God!
For more information on John Eldredge & Ransomed Heart, click here.
For more information on The ManKind Project, click here.
"What I am suggesting is that we reframe the way we look at our lives as men. And the way we look at our relationships with God. I also want to help you reframe the way you relate to other men." (From Fathered by God by John Eldredge - 2009, Thomas Nelson, p. 11)
One of my favorite movies is The Lord of the Rings trilogy of films. If you are familiar with the series, you know that - once the prologue has been presented - the story hones in on what some consider its main character...the hobbit named Frodo Baggins. Each time I watch these epics, I always come away with the sense that in his initiation and masculine journey, one thing is ultimately and most importantly true for Frodo: he didn't go it alone!!
It's absurd for me, as a man among men, to conceive of being initiated alone or traveling the paths of my spiritual and masculine journey by myself. Of course, in both crucibles, there are moments designed for solitude and reflection. This is good - Scripture, of course, bears out many instances where Jesus himself chose to go off alone to a place where he could pray, regroup, rest, grieve...you know, be human.
So, on this amazing sojourn known as the masculine journey, ask yourself a question: "Who is my fellowship? Do I have a company of men to walk with, talk to, trust in, and fight/live/love/play alongside of?" If the answer comes back, "No!" or perhaps, "What do I need that for?" you may look at reconsidering your options. Believe me, I've loved to go it alone in my life...but from this point in my journey, it wasn't wise.
A lot of that came from the pain of agreements I made: such as "I'm on my own and it has to be me to figure life out" or "I can't trust God to show up for me - he's too busy, doesn't care..." I believe what Eldredge is speaking to in the reframing encouragement is to come from that place in my masculine heart where courage meets vulnerability. It is a scary proposition for many men - who know God or don't - to discover that allowing for the fellowship of men to come around him in spirit and truth does really equal having the willingness to change the ingrained patterns of pride or stubbornness or ego of the go it alone myth of being a man.
Here's a question I found invaluable at that stage I asked of myself: "What if ALL of what I've been seeking - love, wholeness, initiation, courage, living deeply in my calling/mission/purpose, peace, healing and faith is to be found within the fellowship of men...and having God father me?"
In one of the final scenes in the trilogy, late into The Return of the King film, there is a beautiful scene where Frodo awakens after being rescued from the destruction of Mount Doom. One by one, starting with Gandalf, he is reunited with the fellowship of men - his fellowship of men - and the joy keeps growing intensely as they share in the victory of what it took them all to do. Frodo didn't go it alone. God, in his wisdom and love, doesn't invite us to either.
For more on John Eldredge and Ransomed Heart, click here.
To purchase a copy of Fathered by God, click here.
For more on John Fontaine & MAXIMUS HEART, click here.
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