Johnny Fontaine: A to Z

As I woke up from my second nap of the day, I began to consider the twilight and my heart. Who am I, Lord?

I have to admit: This is an incomplete list.

But, taking stock, it's me…A to Z!

A: Authentic. Good, bad, or ugly…what you see is what you get.

B: Bold. Hey, wait a minute…Bold! That's better.
C: Courageous. I'm beginning to understand why I feel fear so much in my life – it's because of how much courage is at stake.
D: Dedicated. There's a part of me that won't quit. Maybe it's my heart. Maybe it's all of me.
E: Emotional. I love joy, anger, sadness, fear, and shame. If you can't show any/all of them, I can't trust you.
F: Fierce. That's why I love tigers. Who's gonna f*#k with a tiger?
G: God-loving. More and more, and not perfectly.
H: Honorable. The more I live, the more I understand how important this part of me really is.
I: Integrity. Much the same, the more I live, the more I see how vital it is to be as close to this in all things as possible.
J: Journal-keeper. For 29 years, I've been disciplined enough to keep track of who I am. And I'm not afraid if you read it all.
K: Kind. Underneath the New York City veneer that won't wash off and the Lone Ranger mask, I'm a softy. Don't tell anyone.
L: Loyal. If I'm on your side, I'm not going anywhere.
M: Masculine. I am a man made in the image of God. I let the weight of that be what it is. Deal with it.
N: Naked. This is how I feel sometimes, like Frodo at the end of the line – naked and in the dark.
O: Obstinate. Sometimes my head is harder than concrete, but sometimes it serves me – and the purpose – really well.
P: Passionate.
There is definitely a fire in the belly.
Q: Qualified. I spend as much time running from this word as any of the others.
R: Romantic. I love a good love story, whether I'm in it or not.
S: Strong. There is a sense of surviving.
T: Tactical. I can read the room with the best of them. I know the way in – and the way out.
U: Unwavering. I believe in what I believe in – not what you believe in. They may be the same thing.
V: Victorious. In Christ and His redemption – when all else fails, that is the truth.
W: Warrior. Head, heart, and balls.
X: XXX. There are times I'm raw, uncensored, and crude – sometimes at the most unexpected moments.
Y: Yearning. There is a place in my heart that always is alive to seek more.
Z: Zealous. OK, I had to look up "Z" in the Thesaurus just to make sure I had something—and I do!

Some of this may help you understand me -- some of it won't. Maybe they're just words or labels -- and sewn together, maybe they make up a coat of many fantastic, true colors!